After an agonizing week of labor, here are Parts Fourteen and Fifteen and the Epilogue. This story was a wild ride. By the time I reached the end, I felt as insane as some of the characters. Therefore my only warning is to read this once you are prepared to offer at least one hour of your sanity. Good luck!

Leonard had to admit that he might have made a mistake. When everyone literally cheered at the return of Captain Kirk, Jim shed his tension in the face of their exuberance. It was only because Leonard stepped in, warning the people crowding around Kirk not to engage in physical contact with the still-infected man, that they retracted their hands and Jim forewent his customary shoulder clasps of welcome. But Jim’s eyes were brighter than they had been moments ago; his lips were upturned in a tiny smile. He greeted each officer by name and made the wry comment that he hadn’t meant to fall asleep on the job.

Yes, Leonard’s mistake was evident now. Isolating the crew from their captain—and the captain from his crew—had only served to keep everyone off-balance. As much as Leonard wanted to protect Jim from the harsh reality of their circumstances, he had done the man an injustice by denying him the support and camaraderie of the men and women who trusted him. Worse yet, he had denied the crew the one person who gave them the confidence to fight back when times were toughest.

His guilt must have shown in his face, for Jim touched a hand to his back and thanked him in a grave tone.

“For what?” Leonard asked, becoming uncomfortable as all eyes turned to him.

“Keeping us alive.”

He folded his arms across his chest and pursed his mouth. “It’d be a lot easier if I had patients who cooperated.”

Olivares and Danson grinned at him. Sandeep looked guilty as charged. The still-bedridden Joran muttered that he didn’t think he had been given a choice. Another lieutenant nodded from his bed in solemn agreement. Giotto kept a staunch silence, as always.

Jim’s hand stroked Leonard back, just briefly, as though he knew full well how apologetic Leonard was feeling beneath his bluster. To the others, he said smoothly, “I expect Dr. McCoy’s orders to be followed to the letter.”

An obedient chorus of “Aye, Captain!” prompted Leonard to smile.

He faced to Jim and said, “Captain Kirk will lead by example. Hold out your arm.”

Jim sighed softly but did as instructed, gaze amused. Leonard rolled up the sleeve of the man’s jumpsuit and beckoned Sandeep, who came forward with the case of hyposprays Leonard had barely finished putting together before Giotto’s distress call.

“All who are infected,” the doctor announced as he administered a shot to Jim’s upper arm, “must receive treatment and remain under an hour’s observation before I am willing to clear you for duty. The rest of you can consider this shot your inoculation. Line up.”

The un-infected groaned.

As Jim rolled down his sleeve, Leonard told him in a quieter tone, “I want you to wait for me in there,” indicating the private room where Spock lay unconscious.

Jim insisted, “I need to visit the control room, Bones.”

Giotto stepped up to them and held out his arm. “I will go with Captain Kirk.”

The men watched Leonard, waiting for his decision. Leonard depressed a hypospray against Giotto’s skin and offered a compromise. “I need to see him back here in twenty minutes, Mr. Giotto.”

Kirk countered good-naturedly, “Twenty-five.”

“You’ll have a nice headache by then, Captain. Believe me, you won’t want to delay my attentions.”

The soft smile Jim gave him made Leonard feel better.

Giotto inclined his head in the direction of the exit, saying politely, “After you, sir.”

Kirk strode away, the head of Security falling in step beside him.

Leonard felt a pang that it wasn’t Spock by Jim’s side. Then he had to set that unusual thought aside, for the next person in line was ready to be treated.

Giotto and Kirk came to a stop in front of a closed door. Before Giotto swept a hand across the lock panel and input the entry code, Jim turned to him.

“I should warn you, John. I am not entirely myself right now. I may do or say something strange. If you have cause to question my orders, do so. If you feel threatened, it is permissible to disable me.”

Giotto replied in a steady voice, “That goes without saying, sir. It may be that you can increase our chances of survival, but I certainly have no intention of allowing you to jeopardize them.”

Kirk’s mouth twitched. “Mr. Giotto, now you know why I wanted to keep you on my ship.”

Giotto gave him a strange look. “I had no plans to leave, Captain.”

“Good to hear.” Jim faced the door.

Giotto unlocked it, and the men went inside.

What am I looking for?

A voice answered faintly, as though at a great distance. Nonetheless, it was achingly familiar to Jim. Instructions came in a combination of pictures and words of where to go, what to do.

To Giotto, it must have looked like Jim was an expert at hacking into a security system he had never encountered before. Jim wished he could give credit where credit was due, except that it would be awkward to say, I don’t mind how cozy it is with my first officer inside my head.

His shoulders bunched as his thoughts started the inevitable slide sideways and burned with irritation. Only moments later, his mind cooled.

Thank you, Mr. Spock.

Spock admonished him for the repeated thanks. According to the Vulcan, Jim had a penchant for expressing unnecessary gratitude in the same manner that McCoy offered unnecessary apologies. The habits were illogical, clearly human—and Jim was beginning to understand why Spock took such pleasure in pointing them out.

Admonishment again. Vulcans did not indulge in pleasure.

Jim countered by remembering the various times he had witnessed Spock and McCoy arguing. The memories held his perspective: two friends good-naturedly scrapping, trying to outwit one another; one of them with blue, blue eyes and a mouth that could switch between a scowl and a grin at a moment’s notice; the other, very reserved except in the way his hooded gaze failed to hide how much fun he was having. If anyone took more pleasure in Spock and McCoy’s fights than they did, it was Jim.

Something happened to the connection, then. It sparked and spat like an overloaded circuit. Jim’s impression of Spock became much, much clearer.

Jim, I can feel…

“Captain?”

It took a moment for Jim to come out of his head. He turned around to look at Giotto.

“Something wrong?” the man asked. He indicated the computer screen where Spock’s custom-built security program was waiting for the next command.

“Not at the moment.” Jim faced forward again. “You asked Mr. Spock to sub-layer the shielding. To do that, he had to divert some of the auxiliary power from the environmental controls. The levels need to be monitored regularly, otherwise we might end up in a surprise blizzard. I am attaching a mobile code override. We’ll take the data card with us. It may prove useful in other ways.”

“I didn’t realize your interest in computer science went beyond the basics, sir.”

“Every command-track cadet is required to take three levels of it,” Jim replied before remarking more dryly, “although I took so many courses, I nearly had a double track. It was… fascinating work. I’m especially fond of sub-routines.” There was a slight pressure in his mind. “I’m not divulging that information, mister.”

“Sorry?”

“Ignore me, Lieutenant-Commander. Just trying to hold on to my secrets.”

Giotto shook his head slightly. “I won’t ask.”

Jim gave him a thin-lipped smile. “Yes, it’s better if you don’t.” Another feather-light touch swept across his mind. Spock, focus.

He wanted to tell Bones how easily Spock became distracted, like a child on an unsupervised exploration, and how insatiable Vulcan curiosity was.

No, wait. He couldn’t tell Bones a thing. Bones would give him an earful about the dangers of prolonged telepathic contact. Psy-nulls weren’t meant to have other beings rifling through their heads.

But Spock wasn’t just any being. He was a friend. He was more than—the way Jim felt—

Those thoughts he shut down immediately, so no prying Vulcans could accidentally stumble across them.

Sharing head-space did put him at a disadvantage when he needed to keep a secret. He had acknowledged that each time they entered a mind meld in the past, though admittedly keeping secrets had never been a priority. Truly, he didn’t mind Spock knowing him better than anyone else.

You honor me, Captain. However, I must remind you that the sharing of minds is not an act to be taken lightly.

Do you know how much you sound like Bones?

I see no reason for insult.

Leonard is a wonderful person once you get to know him.

The response from Spock was a strangely familiar emotion. Before Jim could completely decipher its nuances, it vanished.

Ah, so Spock had secrets to keep as well. Jim could be curious too.

Captain… The Vulcan didn’t appear to be comfortable with Jim’s curiosity.

Jim, not Captain. I prefer to be called by my first name when I’m this intimate with someone, he joked.

Another fizzle-pop along the connection. What was that?

Capt—Jim. Desist. Your emotions are… affecting the link.

Worried now, Jim had to know, Are you all right? What am I doing wrong?

The effect is natural, given… I must…

Spock began to fade in and out without warning, and Jim’s orderly thoughts fell apart. He was set adrift in the chaos, an invisible force pulling him closer and closer toward a dark center, an ugly place that had been unburied in his mind.

“—ptain! Captain Kirk!”

Jim blinked as he returned to the mundane world. He had folded his body over the computer console, clutching viciously at his head. Giotto’s grip on his shoulders was almost painful.

The man insisted when Jim pushed away from him, “Captain, we should go back to Dr. McCoy. This can wait.”

“Negative,” he snapped, his tone harder than he meant it to be, as he ruthlessly squashed an urge to pace. “There is no more waiting, Mr. Giotto. The shields will fail us in precisely one hundred fifty-three point six-nine minutes. At that time, the likelihood of—” He stopped talking at the sharp intake of breath of the man standing next to him.

Giotto was looking at him strangely. “…Commander Spock?”

Jim closed his eyes briefly. “I am not Mr. Spock.” What just happened?

I cannot be certain, Jim.

“But he’s with you,” Giotto guessed.

“In a manner of speaking.”

Eventually Giotto replied. “I have no issue obeying you or the Commander, but how can I know which of you is in control?”

Jim almost barked, Does it matter? But it did matter, he knew that very well. An officer like Giotto didn’t blindly take orders, nor should Jim expect him to.

Might I make a suggestion?

Spock did. Jim was somewhat tickled by it, which caused a flavor of confusion from his partner.

He told John, “In the event that Spock needs to assume control, he will—and I quote—treat my body as if it were his own.”

Both of Giotto’s eyebrows flew upwards.

Jim swallowed a chuckle. “In other words, if I act like a Vulcan, I am one.” He returned to the console, finished a line of code, and closed down the security program. “Patch me through to the ship.”

“Aye, Captain.” Giotto contacted the Enterprise then offered up his comm unit.

Jim said into it, “Scotty, how’s our girl?”

“Capt’n!”

The garbled sounds which came through the speaker were several individuals exclaiming his name at once.

Jim’s mood brightened to hear their clamor. He assured them, “Yes, this is Captain Kirk. Attention!” and was rewarded with immediate silence. “Better. Mr. Scott, what do the ship’s scanners pick up from the surface?”

“Interference messes with readings, sir. We cannae distinguish between life forms. Uhura unscrambled communications, but otherwise your position remains unknown.“

So, a large-scale target-and-stun operation was out of the question. They couldn’t risk striking the colony from space when the Enterprise was essentially blind.

Tappan would enjoy the thought of blindly destroying everything.

Thinking about Tappan made Jim angry. No matter what Tappan said no one had the right to harm the people on Tassos III!

Calm embraced his mind, buoyed him up from the dark place that continued to beckon him.

Jim breathed deeply and ran his thumb along the side of the communicator. “I hear the transporters are functional—but not advisable?”

“Not for organic mattter, Capt’n, unless you don’t mind guesswork in how we distinguish your molecules. We’ve only been using it when necessary, based on the coordinates of the communicator signals to move inanimate objects.“

I do prefer my calculations to be precise, but should you require the use of the transporter, I am able to estimate coordinates with ninety-eight point eight percent accuracy.

It’s already difficult to justify the use of a transporter during a Code 7-10. We won’t push our luck unless we have to.

Jim said into the communicator, “Continue as you are, Mr. Scott. You will be one of the first to know if our situation changes. Kirk out.” He closed the device in his hand and turned to Giotto. “Dr. McCoy was right. I do need him now. Let’s go.”

With mixed emotions, Kirk’s crew watched him pace. The younger lieutenants looked hopeful. The Chief of Security was cautious. His senior medical officer glared a bit, as though he only cared that Jim was running down his weak body.

I have nothing, Kirk thought with frustration. Spock, I need to think!

He froze in place, squeezed his eyes shut in regret.

“Jim?”

Jim opened his eyes and glanced at McCoy. Spock… Spock, I apologize. I know you’re doing what you can. It disturbed him when there was no answer.

He made in a slow circle, attempting to distract himself by surveying the ward. When his gaze landed on a particular corner, he asked, “Bones, how close are you to developing the antidote to the poison?”

“You’re assuming that an antidote exists.”

He turned on McCoy, then. “Does it?” He couldn’t bear the thought he might never regain his control.

Leonard’s voice held sympathy. “There’s not really a cure for this particular illness, Jim. Think of it as an overdose of a hallucinogenic drug. It can be treated.”

“And if not treated?”

“In time the poison would its course, but how long that would take I couldn’t tell you. I can say that you’re luckier than someone like him.” He indicated Leta’s son, the patient in the corner that Jim had been staring at. “Because the colonists were exposed to the substance far longer, their bodies have latched onto it like an addiction. I want to bring them out of it, which means inducing withdrawal. The recovery itself will likely take weeks.”

Jim’s heart went out to these people. “What’s the expected survival rate?”

“Can’t say,” answered McCoy in a quieter tone. “Mephredone exposure of this magnitude has never been studied. To ensure their best chance there needs to be dedicated resources on the ground. I recommend bringing in one of the medical ships to take over.”

“The moment we can, we’ll call for aid.”

Leonard nodded. “Dr. M’Benga is awaiting the order.”

Bones was telling him in a subtle way that no matter what else happened on this colony, Tassos III would receive the help it needed to recover in the aftermath. Jim certainly could live with that.

Giotto spoke up. “Captain, not to sound cold-hearted, but our foremost concern should be our survival.”

Jim started to reply but an urge to check the data padd in his hand overcame him. He did so, noting that they had less than two hours until the energy shields around the complex began to deteriorate. If they waited that long, they were doomed.

Giotto studied Jim’s reaction carefully. “Do we fight back? Mr. Scott can send us a supply of phaser rifles and more containment fields.”

McCoy harrumphed. “Perfect. So when the cavalry finally shows up, it will look like we’ve terrorized a whole planet.”

Jim said, “I won’t give Tappan that kind of leverage.”

“We’re cornered,” Giotto pointed out.

“And the instinct is to come out fighting,” he acknowledged. “But Dr. McCoy is right. We have to consider the ripple effect of our actions from here on out. Aggression from Starfleet, or the appearance thereof, could spark an insurrection which none of us are prepared to handle.” He could tell he was deflating their hopes. “I’m not ordering you to sacrifice yourselves. I’m asking you to consider alternative solutions to a firefight.” And if that didn’t sound like advice from Mr. Spock, Jim didn’t know what did.

Well said.

There you are! I thought you had given up on me.

Hardly. I am attempting to stay out your way, as it were, while you decide on an appropriate course of action.

Spock, your insight is part of my decision-making process.

A sense of warmth was projected at him.

“Jim? Jim, are you listening?”

Jim cleared his throat, realizing his silences were upsetting his doctor. This was one of the drawbacks to engaging in separate conversations with his two most trusted advisors. He would always prefer that the three of them brainstorm together.

The warmth in his mind blazed fire-hot for a moment. Jim made a small gasp, surprised by its intensity. McCoy was at his side in an instant, scanning him head to toe with a medical tricorder.

Embarrassed, Jim made a shooing motion. “I’m all right, Bones. I just had a thought.”

“Don’t lie to me,” snapped the doctor; nonetheless, he retracted his tricorder.

Jim couldn’t meet the man’s eyes. He turned to the others. “Our alternative solution is escape, ladies and gentlemen—which at this juncture I would gladly consider a victory. The question becomes how we accomplish it.”

Lieutenant Sandeep raised a hand. “We could drop the shield and make a run for it… but there’s nowhere to go that would be safer than there.”

“Except the Enterprise,” Danson added. “Dr. McCoy, can’t you lift the quarantine?”

“The quarantine stays,” Jim answered for his CMO. “I won’t risk an infection finding its way off planet.”

Giotto folded his arms. “A gas attack, then. Neutralize the colonists without causalities so Tappan has no one to send after us.”

“How’s that different than stunning them?” Olivares questioned.

Jim had a thought. “It’s not that different unless… we make it different. Bones.” He stared at his CMO. “We need that mephredone treatment ASAP.”

With a huff, McCoy crossed his arms over his chest. “What other miracles shall I perform while I’m at it, Captain?”

Jim clapped a hand to the doctor’s shoulder. “You can do it.”

“What’s your plan?” Giotto wanted to know.

Jim said, “We will give the Governor what he wants.”

“Jim, he wants you!”

“And he shall have me,” Jim replied.

Giotto reached for his phaser and moved to block the exit.

Jim said, amused, “Stand down, Mr. Giotto.”

Leonard shackled Jim’s wrist. “We can’t let you do it, Jim. There has to be a better way.”

Oh, his people were much too stubborn.

“You said you needed me.” Jim met each officer’s gaze in turn. “How can that be true if you aren’t willing to trust me?”

After a thoughtful silence, his Chief of Security re-sheathed the phaser. “You have our trust, Captain Kirk.”

The others echoed their agreement one by one.

Everyone, that was, except for Dr. McCoy.

Jim understood Leonard’s silence. It had nothing to do with trust or faith. He slid his hand down McCoy’s arm and gave the tense fingers a comforting squeeze. “Bring everyone together. Contact the Enterprise,” he ordered. “I’ll explain, and we can iron out the details together.”

Sandeep and Olivares each headed to a biobed, Danson went in search of Kolarski, and Giotto flipped opened his communicator. Jim felt a gentle prick against the side of his neck. He touched the spot and asked McCoy, “What was that?”

“Vitamins,” came the gruff answer. Leonard busied himself with resetting the dosage on the hypospray in his hand. “Don’t worry,” he added more quietly, “I wouldn’t give you something that could affect the connection to Spock.” He paused. “How is he?”

Jim loved this man. He truly did—and he saw no reason to hide those feelings from the companion in his head. “Spock doesn’t want you to worry about him.”

Leonard shook his head slightly. “Easier said than done.” He slipped the hypo back into a pocket. “Speaking of, I’ll go check on the hobgoblin. Be right back.”

Jim watched him leave. Spock.

Yes, Jim?

Can we pull it off?

We must hope that we can.

Agreed. Jim sighed. Spock, I want to try this but I don’t want to risk you. Tell me if you can’t do it.

The answer was accompanied by a strong undertone of pride and no small amount of trust: I am capable, Jim.

Jim hoped his gratitude was evident.

After the briefing, Leonard pulled his captain into Spock’s room with an excuse he barely remembered. Once the door whisked shut, he covered his face with his hands.

Jim called his name sharply. “Bones?”

Leonard dragged his hands down his face. “Do you consider no risk to be too great?”

Kirk pressed his mouth into a line. “I understand what’s at risk here, Dr. McCoy.”

Leonard willed himself not to lose patience. “You know Tappan won’t be easy to fool, which means there is only one way you can convince him that he has won.” Leonard held Kirk’s gaze. “You intend to revert back to the way you were.”

The man nodded.

“With Spock as your safety net,” concluded the doctor, looking away. “He already agreed to this plan, no doubt. Did you even consider what happens if you break him?”

Silence.

He turned back to Jim, saw the hurt as plain as day on Kirk’s face, but knew he couldn’t take any of it back. “Someone needs to say this for Spock’s sake. Hell, you’re already in the process of damaging him.” He pointed to the unconscious body on the bed. “I had to shut off the alarms because his vitals are so far out of range, everyone in this building would be deaf by now. Doing this could be the final nail in his coffin.”

“Spock can come back from this.”

Leonard’s thin smile held no humor in it. “And you believe him because he never lies?”

Kirk curled a fist, started forward but abruptly pulled back. “What are you driving at, Bones?”

“Don’t trust Spock to abide by his limits. He’ll gladly die for you and you will know it only a second after it’s too late.” Leonard swallowed hard. “I’m speaking as his physician and your friend. Gambling with your life—that’s bad enough. Don’t gamble with someone else’s.”

Jim’s expression had shuttered as Leonard spoke, and Leonard prepared himself for an unpleasant response. But rather than saying something that would hurt them both deeply, Kirk’s facial muscles suddenly relaxed. He straightened his spine and fell into parade rest; and when the man looked at Leonard, his face more composed than Leonard had ever seen it.

“I must disagree with you,” Jim said.

Leonard was torn between relief and apprehension. “About time you showed up.”

Only one of Kirk’s eyebrows lifted, something which Jim had never been able to do.

“I can’t say I’m happy to see you,” Leonard continued on, “especially since that’s not your body.”

“Forego the lecture, Doctor. There is no time for it.”

Leonard stepped in close and leveled a finger at Kirk’s nose. “Don’t tell me what to do, you pointy-eared hobgoblin!”

Jim blinked, reached up and delicately traced the edge of one of his round ears. “Fascinating.”

“Spock!” Leonard turned bright red on Jim’s behalf.

Jim resumed his formal stance. “I appreciate your concern for my well-being, Dr. McCoy. However, it stands that I have chosen this path of my own will.”

“Then what are we supposed to do if your body gives out?”

Jim never hesitated. “Perform the rite of the katric ark.”

Before Leonard could ask what a katric ark was, Jim amended in Spock’s monotone, “In the event of my death, Jim will be made aware of what to do.”

Leonard’s throat closed on him.

Jim released his hands and reached forward, curling his fingers around one of Leonard’s arms.

“Spock…” Leonard began to say, but the emotion that came into Jim’s face could not have belonged to Spock.

Without resistance, Leonard went into his lover’s arms.

“Leonard,” Jim said softly, a tinge of wonder to his voice. Kirk’s body relaxed at the same time his arms tightened around McCoy.

“Bones,” Jim murmured against his ear.

“You can’t do this to me, Jim.”

“You won’t lose us.” Jim’s hands ran down the doctor’s back. “Trust me?”

Leonard answered this time, knowing Jim deserved to hear the words. “I trust you.”

“Then help us win.”

He nodded. There was little else he could do.