Title: Untitled (1/?)
Author:
Pairing: Kirk/Spock/McCoy
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer:  Thank you to Paramount and Roddenberry; you get the credit.
Summary: Something has changed McCoy and he’s not sure how to explain it to his lovers.
Other Notes:  My first ST fic ever!  I’ve had this scene in my head for ages.  Had to come out eventually.  Sorry, no beta.  Don’t mind the mistakes.

He watches the waves break, the sound soothing. Dusk arrives, one strange crab-like creature venturing across the sandy beach. A small breeze cools the heat at the back of his neck, remnants of a sunny afternoon.

How is he going to explain? Not even sure if he understands the situation himself. Not even sure if he knows himself anymore.

It all started at the end of a mission gone sour. Leonard had spent an extended amount of time in Sickbay, directing the flow of incoming injured parties while dividing his attention with the serious cases. None had called for more than a short patch-up surgery (for which he was grateful), but the sheer volume of wounded ensigns rivaled his early post-med school days in a large city ER. He had been exhausted, taking only a half-shift off here and there to rest his mind and hands. The Captain secured shore leave for a weary crew as soon as things quieted down.

That’s what eventually drove events to this point, this beach where he attempts to find the courage to approach the two most important men in his life. To tell them about what has happened, what has changed, in the past few days. He hasn’t been pushing them away, not like he knows they think he has.

It’s just been too overwhelming. Too different and difficult to grasp.

(So much possibility. It terrifies McCoy.)

He knows Jim and Spock have returned from their trip into town. There is a skittering along his back that confirms they are nearby, probably settling into an after-dinner drink for Jim while Spock sets up the 3-D chessboard for the evening game. Both have always worked so well together, without a need for words, like habit.

They’ve also worked well together against him. He expects that too. Soon. They will stand close, shoulders brushing, forming a wall that essentially will make McCoy want to stand down, move away. Because he knows against them, his defenses are weak–his offense weaker.

He loves them too much.

(That’s why it will hurt, Len, when you reveal this new thing.)

But it wasn’t his fault, God dammit! A classic case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time with an individual determined to have her way. Hell, he’d never even guessed at what she had done to him until days later. And fixing this situation? Restoring Doctor Leonard McCoy to a normal man again–well, that was impossible, wasn’t it? She refused his demands. Said he had a purpose now, as if saving lives on a daily basis wasn’t purpose. (Just how many more would need to be saved to make him worthy? He estimated too many and never enough.)

How do you tell someone you love that you’ve changed? No, not your feelings. (Stop, Jim! Listen to me. Never my feelings. Nevernevernever.) You. Your being, that core, the one that says I am human, Terran, Joe-average and old-country-doctor. Same.

It’s gone now. How do you tell the someones you love that you are altered–such a simple irrevocable fact…

Bones is no longer human.  

Author’s Notes: No, it is not an angsty teen novel, people.  This has NOTHING to do with Bones being bitten by a vamp or werewolf.  LOL.  You’ll just have to imagine what’s going on for yourselves.  But point-in-case, he’s a little upset and bit dramatic at the moment. 

On to Part 2.

Related Posts:

• Untitled (15/15) – from June 8, 2010
• Untitled (14/15) – from June 8, 2010
• Untitled (13/?) – from June 7, 2010
• Untitled (12/?) – from June 4, 2010
• Untitled (11/?) – from June 2, 2010