Title: For the Sake of Nothing, Part 17
Author: klmeri
Fandom: Star Trek AOS
Pairing: pre-Kirk/Spock/McCoy
Summary: If Jim had problems before… Pike isn’t making them better.
Previous Parts: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16

Jim was mutinously silent, which surprised no one. Spock had settled on relaying the events which occurred after he had spied Jim “leaving the premises without explanation”. At the point where Spock began to hint he was responsible for sending the cop after Jim, Leonard butted in.

“The chase was my idea.”

The twitch of Spock’s eyebrows probably meant he thought Leonard talked too much. Though he ignored that, Leonard shifted somewhat nervously in his chair now that he had come under Pike’s scrutiny. “I guess it… wasn’t a very good one?”

“Definitely not,” Pike remarked dryly. “I suppose you started the fight as well.”

Why did Pike make it sound like Leonard was lying?

He bristled. “As a matter of fact, I did.” A hint of belligerence seeped into his voice. “I’ve got a problem with men who think they can beat on a guy because they wear a badge.”

The room suddenly felt dangerous. “The way I heard it,” Pike said, voice deceptively flat, “Kirk resisted arrest.”

“So he gets his insides pulverized by a nightstick?” McCoy snorted and leaned forward in his chair, jabbing a finger at Pike. “Can’t say I’m sorry—”

“Bones.”

“—that asshole cop of yours got what was comin’ to ‘im. Damn shame my first punch missed.”

“Bones,” Jim bit out warningly.

Pike and Leonard engaged in a very intense staring contest. After a full minute, Pike eased back in his chair but never once broke eye contact with him. “So,” the Captain said too mildly, “you do want to go to jail.”

Leonard hoped nobody in the room could hear the erratic beating of his heart. “Funny, I thought that’s where we already were… sir.” That last bit of disrespectful sarcasm would without doubt push Captain Pike over the edge.

Instead, Pike smiled.

“Chris,” Jim began, “he wasn’t the one who—”

“Shut up, Jim,” Pike said, still smiling.

Leonard had the sudden suspicion that a smiling Christopher Pike was akin to a warning sign which read beware, maniac now engaged – hide the cutlery! Leonard recoiled in his seat a little and pretended he wasn’t gripping the chair’s arms with unnecessary force. Oh yes, he had definitely stuck his foot in a big pile of shit this time. Why did he always do that?

Leave it to Kirk to never be quiet on command. Jim stood up. “I hit the cop, that’s what matters.”

Slowly, Pike’s gaze tracked to Jim. “Is it?” he asked with equal slowness.

“Yes,” Jim replied, fists clenching.

Spock opened his mouth to argue. Leonard reached over and pinched Spock’s wrist, strangely aware that some kind of undercurrent was running through the room he and Spock weren’t familiar with. And they needed to stay out of it.

Pike was watching Kirk now, his smile not at all an attempt at pleasantness. “Your friend’s got a mouth on him.”

The curl of Jim’s lips was full of dark amusement. “Oh, I know.”

“Tell me the reason these two were chasing after you. …And, Kirk? Skip the part where you lie through your teeth.”

“It’s not your business.” Jim was in full stubborn-mode.

Somehow that softened the glint of crazy in Pike’s smile. “Son, you made your business my business the moment you put yourself on my radar.”

“Believe me,” the younger man said grimly, “being on police radar was last thing I wanted when I came to you.”

Pike’s expression relaxed. “Jim, sit down.”

Jim sat, though he didn’t look pleased that Pike kept ordering him about—and that he ended up obeying so easily.

Pike picked up a ballpoint pen from his desk and used it the way a schoolmarm wielded a ruler. First, he pointed to Spock. “You seem like the sanest of the bunch so I am not inclined to ruin your clean record by giving you one. You,” next he pointed to McCoy, “don’t have a prior record either, though God knows why with your tendency to bitch at the wrong people and stick your foot in your mouth. But I would be a hypocrite if I let the smart one go and kept the dumb one.”

Leonard sputtered.

Finally he aimed his pen in Jim’s direction. “Jim, Jim, Jim,” the Captain said with a slow, sad shake of his head. “I know for a fact you do shit that would put you behind bars. On the other hand, you did voluntarily perform a service for this precinct. Normally I am not given to granting favors…”

Jim looked like he was gritting his teeth. “I don’t want a favor from you.”

“You idiot!” Leonard exploded, because Leonard had been beginning to hope they weren’t en route to communal showers with convicted murderers, and leaned over Spock who was in between them to whack Jim on the back of the head. Frustratingly, Kirk had positioned his chair far enough out of Leonard’s physical reach. Spock looked resigned to having Leonard draped across his lap, arms flailing in order to do violence to a person.

“As amusing as this three stooges’ act is,” Pike continued once Leonard had finally given up and returned to his own chair to sulk, “being in the same room with you for more than thirty seconds gives me a migraine.” He planted his elbows on his desk and wrapped his hands around his pen. “So I want an answer to one question. Then you can go.”

Leonard blinked. Was it that easy?

Pike’s eyes settled on Leonard, glinted knowingly. “Don’t worry, gentlemen. I have your personal information now and the ability to instate a county-wide manhunt. If I want you back here, there’s not a damn thing you can do to stop me from bringing you in.”

This Crazy Smile Captain was scary, Leonard had to admit. “What’s the question?”

Pike observed Jim. Jim had stilled so Leonard doubted he remembered to breathe. “Why were you running?” Pike asked.

Jim’s face lost color. “I was… I n-needed to be any—”

Anywhere but here, Jim? Leonard finished that stilted sentence easily enough.

“—to go out-of-state,” Jim corrected, “for a while.”

“I didn’t ask where, Kirk, I asked why.”

Jim said nothing.

Rather than getting angry, Pike gentled his voice. “Is somebody after you?”

Jim gave a miserable “No.”

“Don’t lie to me about this, son. It’s important. You may have helped us catch some small fish but there’s still a shark out there, and my sources say he isn’t too happy with you.”

Some of the color returned to Jim’s face. “No lie, sir. My decision had nothing to do with him.”

Pike’s expression said he didn’t believe that. “Then why the hell are you skipping town?”

Jim probably didn’t mean to but he glanced in Spock and McCoy’s direction. That was a fatal mistake, Leonard mused, as Pike looked from Kirk to them and back again, his too-intelligent eyes picking up on details no one else would.

“…I see,” Pike said after a moment of silence then resorted to massaging the bridge of his nose with one hand while sighing. Maybe it was possible they did give him a migraine.

Leonard almost squirmed in his seat, an urge he suppressed ruthlessly; his need to know, however, could not be suppressed. “What does that mean?” What was there to see?

“It means if this conversation is about to turn into an episode of the Love Boat, I’m not interested. I have paperwork to do and deadlines to meet.” To make his point, Pike dragged a manila folder front-and-center on his desk and flipped in open. He clicked the ballpoint pen once and scribbled something under the mug shot of a mean-looking individual. Not looking up, he said, “Get out.”

Leonard looked at the door, which Jim had flung open in a matter of seconds and disappeared through like someone had lit a fire under his ass. Spock, at the very least, had a perplexed expression similar to McCoy’s.

“Where are we supposed to go?” Leonard wanted to know. At the same time he prayed: Please, God, don’t let it be back to that shitty cell.

“Somebody in Booking screwed up,” Pike said, barely pausing in his note-making, “and lost your arrest report. Or so I heard.”

“But…?”

“Could be it never existed, McCoy.” Annoyed, Pike finally looked at him and enunciated very slowly, as if Leonard really was the dumb one, “Do I have to say more?”

“No,” Spock intervened. “Your assistance with this… incident has been remarkably judicious, Captain—and very much appreciated.” Spock latched onto Leonard’s arm and dragged Leonard out of Pike’s office before Leonard could say anything otherwise.

Leonard shook off Spock’s grip as soon as they were in the parking lot. Jim was nowhere to be seen.

“…What just happened, Spock?”

Spock made a beeline for his car. “I would rather we prolong that particular discussion, Leonard.”

Spock had a point. Standing within hearing range of every law-enforcement officer in the city was the not the ideal place to determine why Pike had let them walk away without repercussions. Forgoing protest, Leonard slid into the passenger seat of Spock’s car. When he glanced in the back, Jim was there, huddled low in the seat with a white-knuckled grip on a dirty duffle bag.

“Jim, how the hell did you…?”

“Get us out of here, Spock,” Kirk said. “Now.”

Wordlessly, Spock complied.

Leonard thought Spock was going to drive them back to Jim’s apartment. Instead they pulled up to a house with a neatly kept lawn and neighborhood children playing down the street.

“Please use the door this time,” Spock said as he handed a set of keys to Jim, who slid out of the car and paused long enough by the window to reply by way of his middle finger. Then Kirk stalked up the sidewalk to Spock’s front door.

Leonard did not bother to get out. “Does he have a right to be pissed?”

“Our actions resulted in his near-incarceration.”

Leonard glanced at Spock, who was watching Jim. “We also prevented him from getting on that bus.”

A smile ghosted Spock’s lips.

When Jim was officially out of sight, Leonard spoke again. “Who did Pike mean by the ‘shark’? …I expect we ought to be worried about that? I’m pretty damn sure he mentioned it in front of us on purpose.”

“Undoubtedly.”

“To which part?”

“Both.” Spock turned to look at Leonard. “Why did he leave?”

Without thinking, Leonard reached over and rested his hand on top of Spock’s; it seemed rather natural that Spock turned his hand over so they could entwine their fingers. “Why does Jim do anything without rationale or explanation? He’s scared, I think.” The moment those words left his mouth, he knew them to be true.

“That seems at odds with his personality.”

“Even the bravest man has something to fear,” Leonard said.

Spock’s thumb brushed lightly across his skin. “What do you fear, Leonard?”

“I thought I feared this. Guess not.” Leonard almost smiled but settled for a snort and a faint quirk of his mouth. He was giving too much away already.

Spock’s gaze dropped to their joined hands. “This is most unusual. I am not certain I understand it.”

“Who says you have to understand something to enjoy it?”

Now Spock was smiling, in that odd way of his where the smile shone more in the heaviness of his gaze rather than the minute lift of his mouth. “You are wiser,” he told Leonard, “than I expected.”

“I’m not sure that’s a compliment, Spock,” Leonard drawled, though he knew he failed to look offended.

“It is a statement of surprise—and an admiration I hope you continue to inspire.”

Leonard couldn’t help it. He laughed. “Who would have thought? I’m wise and you’re charming!”

“That has to be a compliment,” Spock decided and kissed him.

Jim let the curtain fall back into place and dropped his forehead against the wall by the window. It didn’t matter if he was standing here, so obviously in a position of spying, because neither Spock nor Bones looked like they would be coming into the house anytime soon.

They were together.

His attempt to bring them closer had succeeded with swift and impressive results. So why was he this let down? Why should he feel like he had just handed over the most precious possession he had to a thief?

The duffle bag hung heavily from his hand, a reminder of what his options were. Except… he didn’t have this option anymore, did he? The cash in his bag was gone, deposited into the pocket of whatever corrupt cop had searched through his belongings. The photo was still there; the clothes, the medicine, and the random bits of nothing that would not mean anything to anyone but Jim. Yet even without the savings, Jim knew he could find his way. He had in the past.

No, it wasn’t the money. There was Pike to consider. Pike who would be watching him now that he had been tipped off to Jim’s whereabouts and the fact that Jim had an urgent inclination to be elsewhere. Pike, the meddling bastard that he was, had lost track of him once before; Jim doubted the Captain would let that happen a second time.

He had no desire to become a flying monkey for the police department, despite all the supposed perks of being “in the loop”. If he became an inside man (that is, a snitch) he was as good as dead. He knew that; Pike knew that. Jim was great at surviving, sure, and he had better instincts for a con than most men, but talent couldn’t deter death at the hands of hardened criminals, no matter what protection Pike promised.

Jim had slipped out of Pike’s grasp the moment their deal was done (a fucking voluntary deal?—that wasn’t how Jim remembered their last interaction at all) and stayed away. By then, he had been desperately craving some semblance of a normal life. Becoming part of a humble coffee shop world, part of Spock’s world, had seemed wonderful, perfect, like it was meant just for him.

Then he tried to draw McCoy into that same world and—

Voices at the front door. Jim’s eyes flew open and he skittered away from the window. He swung around the corner of the living room and flattened himself to the wall in the hallway in the same moment the door opened and closed.

“I’ll need to go home sometime, Spock,” Bones was saying.

Spock replied, too low for Jim to hear.

Jim took a deep breath, released it, and slunk towards the guest bedroom. He hid the duffle bag under the bed, though it didn’t seem like a safe enough place (that would have to be fixed later), and went to the bathroom. He washed his face, composed a somewhat plausible story, and spent an extra three minutes simply looking at the dark circles under his eyes and lines of stress he hadn’t noticed before. Then someone was tapping lightly on the bathroom door.

Spock watched Jim carefully as he exited the bathroom. “Leonard has volunteered to prepare dinner.”

Jim gave him a tired smile. “Is that a good idea? Do we know if he can cook?”

“We know he will make the attempt, regardless of the results.”

Jim sat on the edge of his bed. “I’m not very hungry, Spock. Tell Bones to make it a dinner for two.” He almost twitched out of range when, without warning, Spock placed a hand on his shoulder.

“Jim, there are questions I must ask you.”

How hard would it be to reach up and tug Spock into bed with him?

Jim ran a hand over his face, mostly to hide his expression of surprise and confusion, uncertain of where that thought had come from.

“Jim?”

“Yeah, Spock, I know,” he croaked awkwardly. Please step back, please step back, please step back.

Spock politely accepted Jim’s refusal to look at him, removed his hand from Kirk’s shoulder, and at last stepped back. Jim felt boneless with relief.

“There is something I must tell you also, once you are properly rested,” his friend said solemnly before gliding to the open bedroom door. There Spock paused.

Jim almost cringed in expectation of what else was to come.

“Jim…” Worse than any accusation—it was a plea. “…please stay.”

This is why he never announced his intentions beforehand. Spock’s soft tone of voice implied fairly clearly that Jim’s leave-taking would utterly devastate him. Though it made no sense, Spock had the strange ability to weaken his resolve, to make him doubt even his firmest beliefs. It was, perhaps, the one thing Jim could never quite forgive Spock for, having such a strong effect on him.

After a few heartbeats of silence, Jim told the ceiling, “I’ll stay.” The promise was so quiet he hoped it might go unheard.

Spock thanked him and retreated, the bedroom door left standing notably open in his wake. Jim curled into a pillow, cursed his life in one instant and fell asleep in the next. If someone tucked the covers over his shoulder at a later point in time, he did not rouse enough to see who it was.

Next Part

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