Title: A Series of Laughs – 3
Author: klmeri
Fandom: Star Trek TOS
Characters: Enterprise crew
Summary: Drabble fill for trek_crackbingo prompt: wild animals.
Previous Fills: 1 | 2

“Ladies and gents, children of all ages! Do we have a show for you this evening!” Ringmaster Kirk doffs his top hat and tosses it once in the air, catching it behind his back with an ease that makes little children scream in excitement.

Tonight, the Enterprise Circus has their main tent brimming with an intrigued audience—both big and small, old and young. The colored lights perform a dazzling dance across the hard-packed dirt and straw-littered ground. Scotty has done a great job with the old mechanical spotlights that they cart from town to town. Jim ought to pay him an extra day’s wage for the fine work—if the show earns enough during the two weeks they will be situated on the outskirts of the dusty town.

He introduces the performers with flair. “You will be amazed by our acrobats and their daring leaps of faith.” Pavel, high up above the audience, does a quick run and tumble across the stretched wire. People gasp. Nyota and her small band of traipse artists do a series of short swings, flips and catches—Uhura’s red tight outfit like fire shimmering in the moving lights. Jim stands proudly in the center ring, a grin stretching his face as Nyota is passed with ease from swing to swing, even caught by her foot at one point which sends up a wave of applause. These folks haven’t seen a tenth of his crew’s talent and they are already in awe.

Commanding the attention of the audience again, he crows, “You will laugh until your sides hurt!” Enter the clowns on small bicycles. Bones, the leader of the Clown Brigade, walks amidst the troupe in a casual stroll. His face is painted in ridiculous shades of white, blue, and red. One of the cycling clowns—a bright yellow costumed Chapel, Bone’s right-hand woman in inventing and revising their stunts—”accidentally” meanders off her path with a tell-tale wobble and crashes into Bones. He is, unbeknownst to the avid watchers, absolutely prepared, does a loud shout (an obscure Russian curse, since Jim says that the man can’t horrify their potential payers with his filthy mouth—it’s all about sales, Kirk insists), flings himself into a long roll and pops up staggering like a drunk. He says something like “Watch out for them bees, Ma!” in his rolling Southern accent, sending everyone into gales of laughter.

Kirk waits until the laughter subsides. “The show does not end there! Prepare to be entranced by the Great Sulu!”

Hikaru Sulu is decked out in his magician’s attire. “I am the Great Sulu! I have powers unlike any other. I can make it rain…” With a wave of the man’s hand, Scotty is cued to release the small blasts of confetti, and it rains glittering color. “I can make it storm!” Sulu, more of an actor like Kirk than an actual magician, flings both arms wide and a sharp crack of thunder rolls across the top of the tent. He grins widely and pulls off his tall black hat. “I can even pull a rabbit out of my hat!” The audience chuckles when Sulu produces a white, startled looking bunny. Hikaru bows and, in a wave of smoke, vanishes.

Once the excited chatter has quieted to murmurs, Kirk purposefully clasps his hands behind his back and does a long pace across the center ring. “But the best is always last, my good people.” He drops his voice to low menace and projects it straight at them. “Not just the best—the most dangerous.” There is a pause in his pacing and his words. It has the desired effect. They are riveted.

“Behold!” is his sudden bellow. Kirk swings his white-gloved hand to the dead center of the tent. A black sheet is pulled off of a large object with a flourish by two circus performers, dressed-up workers of Scotty’s—maintenance by day and part of the show by night. (Even in this small way, Kirk makes sure that everyone is involved.)

There are loud gasps and titters. “The beast!” Jim cries. As if it knows its job, the tiger roars loudly and paws at its cage bars.

Jim pivots to his left. “And his tamer!”

A spotlight hits the exotic face of Spock, who silently and calmly walks into the center ring.

Some of the audience shift nervously when the tiger jumps in the direction of Spock. Little do they know how much that big kitty is enamored of Mr. Spock, who raised it from a cub. Spock will have it purring and tame in no time flat. Because it’s better for business, Jim has worked out a routine with the animal tamer that keeps the audience on the edge of their seats as the tiger seems to vacillate between being wild and giving in to its master. They have this performance down to a fine art.

The crowd is anxious now for the Enterprise Circus’s promise of wild and wonderful entertainment. He has teased them long enough. The elephants come ambling in, the beautiful lady Galia with her bouncing red curls waving languidly to everyone from her high perch on the tallest elephant. Bones sends in his clowns, he himself juggling, while Pavel and Uhura and the team of acrobats jump over one another and somersault in the air. Sulu comes to stand beside Spock who is motionless in the middle of the chaotic orchestra of light, sound, and uproarious applause.

The ringmaster—one James Tiberius Kirk—cries out, “Let the show begin!”

Is it bad that I want to turn this idea into a full-blown AU?

4

Related Posts:

• A Series of Laughs – 9 – from February 9, 2011
• A Series of Laughs – 8 – from January 16, 2011
• A Series of Laughs – 7 – from December 11, 2010
• A Series of Laughs – 6 – from December 10, 2010
• A Series of Laughs – 5 – from December 8, 2010